#19 Porn As The Special Interest
Written by SAPL on August 24th, 2008 in Hobbies and Special Interests.
In some instances, it seems the Asperger male (or female for that matter), is really no different from the neurotypical after all. The interest in porn is a perfect example. But the Asperger’s interest is not just about getting to rate the boobs of the day. The Asperger will use porn for academic purposes or to obsess with a particular body part that may be a special interest. If there were more doctorate programs in pornography, we’d have more Kinseys than we’d know what to do with. As the Asperger studies porn, he chooses to major in a particular area and ask such deep questions as,”How could a woman have such ripped abs?” if he is into muscular/bodybuilder/he-she like ladies. Some Aspies mistakenly think they can learn about relationships from porn, but soon realize there is nothing further from the truth. How on earth can they get to know each other? There’s never any talking going on in these things.
An HBO movie might incite statements from the neurotypical such as, “No way, man! No one has a penis that big,” or “How would you make a sex toy that big anyway?” This is where the Asperger, armed with all the information he has obtained from studying “101 Factos about sex toys”, comes in to rescue the undereducated and horny neurotypical. “The sex toys are made from molds of an actual penis. There is a clay mix you add water to and stir. It is similar to making dental casts. You can even order them online and mix them in your own kitchen with a regular bowl and spoon.”
At this point in the conversation, the neurotypical men mentally note: Dude, never eat at this guy’s house again!
“Once the mix is complete,” the Asperger continues, “you place the erect penis in the clay, allow it to cool, remove your penis, pour liquid into the mold, and ta da! You have created a dildo.”
The neurotypical men are having an extreme WTF moment now, probably due to both the Asperger’s explanation and the amount of alcohol consumed. This is obviously more than they signed up for when the rented Vicky Vixen. The insecure, jealous, and paranoid neurotypical will start to wonder and be convinced that the only way the Asperger could possibly know all this information is if he is the model on which all sex toys are crafted from. To this speculation, the Asperger will decide that some rumors are best left undenied.
Image: afflsports
August 25th, 2008 at 6:31 am
“Once the mix is complete,” the Asperger continues,….
OMG, I laughed ’til I was sick! This is your masterpiece so far.
and “Dude, never eat at this guy’s house again!”….
These are real concerns the friend of an Aspergerer has to watch out for, you know?
June 2nd, 2010 at 12:21 am
Porn actually conflicts with my sense of morality (mentioned in the posting on “honesty”) and therefore I’ve always looked down on the stuff, it IS prostitution! Especially as a chick, I cant seperate from the fact that something incredibly fucked up (probably molestation by someone close early in life) lead these folks to end up doing what they do. A friend got a karma sutra book with positions for their birthday and I analyzed many of the poses as being impractical for enjoyability, either because you would have to have incredible balance or its just generally an comfortable way to be humped.
October 4th, 2011 at 7:41 pm
At the end of the make-your-own dildo speech, the neurotypical women will try to get your number–or at least a few of them did when I happened to do that particular thing.
November 16th, 2011 at 9:59 pm
I understand what you mean about specific parts becoming most interesting. For me I find ejaculation and semen to be fascinating and more sexy than any other part of men. I am an aspie too.
March 7th, 2012 at 6:20 am
I actually like that picture of the girl laying on the random access memory cards
August 27th, 2012 at 1:27 am
Why all the old edo ram?
November 6th, 2012 at 7:35 am
I am a male aspie and my wife is also an aspie. The funny thing is, she bought me one of those mold kits so she could have a replica of my erect penis when she would masturbate. The kit worked quite well, and made an exact duplicate with a somewhat realistic feel to it. She swears by it when she masturbates, and has mentioned many times it is the next best thing to me. We have since made several more, and, in true aspie fashion, I modified a Rabbit style thrusting vibrator, (took the innards out and modified the molded replica of my penis) so now she has a great Rabbit style vibrator with all the functions but the penis part is shaped just like mine. All the settings work and the rabbit ear section works just as it did before I made the modifications. If you are an aspie with a girlfriend/wife, or even a female aspie, and sex or sex toys are one of your special interests, this is a really cool project that with enough research and persistence (not difficult if you are an aspie) is fairly easy to accomplish. Your girlfriend/wife (or you, the female aspie) will love it to death and probably wear it out. She said she loves it so much because she feels like she is masturbating with a part of me instead of something made from some other random person’s mold. =)
January 30th, 2013 at 3:10 am
I actually have a really bad association with porn (from discovering it during innocent web surfing right at the same time I became a large-chested blonde preteen–That messed me up for years!), but thank you for the idea about the sex toys. If I ever get married (which is a very promising strategy for someone with executive functioning problems like mine) I will feel much better morally about using marital aids based on my own husband’s body. It may not ever come up, depending on the sort of man who will take me, but just in case…thanks again. 🙂
P.S. @Mariam–That too.
March 3rd, 2013 at 10:22 pm
Absolutely hillarious! Very true.. We’re that technical/ explicative… and yes my pleasure is worth hardcore research (which I love anyways). 🙂
April 5th, 2016 at 10:10 pm
Bryan… just wow, man… I myself am in your boat and I spend my time making up fictional characters, but that’s amazing how explaining the creation of a dildo to an NT girl lands you her number.