#18 Providing More Than The Minimum Coverage

Written by SAPL on August 18th, 2008 in Socialization.

Details are important for the Asperger, even the details that aren’t important for everyone else, weren’t asked for, and no one cares about. This is why, when asking the Asperger a simple question, you’re likely to get more than the minimum coverage.

More than the minimum coverage usually takes place in 2 categories: A Shakespearean monologue for a yes/no question and TMI-Too much information. TMI is, of course, not just extra conversation, but the kind of coverage that just does not make for good dinner conversation. This will often take place in groups, such as a walk in the park on a hot summer day, for example.

Let’s say the Asperger drank several bottles of water, but still hasn’t had a need for a bathroom break like every other member in the group. “You probably are dehydrated,” a fellow hiker may suggest.

“You’re probably right,” the Asperger replies. “In fact, I must be dehydrated because my urine was extremely dark this morning. And I’ve been terribly constipated as well. But it may be due to my bathroom rhythms. I usually have certain times of the day I urinate and hardly ever go off schedule. It must not be time urinate yet. But having bathroom schedules are convenient because you always know when you’re going to go. Except of course, when it’s time and you can’t find a bathroom. There have been 2 times there wasn’t a bathroom around and I am so glad I was wearing dark pants because…”

We can all see that the TMI checkpoint was missed long ago.

While other monologues may not hit the TMI scale, they still provide more than the minimum coverage. Directions to the pharmacy come with the history of why all the streets are named what they are named, the business that used to occupy the pharmacy building, the arrangements of the aisle and the order of medicines in them, etc., etc. Hopefully, she or he will remember the social rule of not asking what you’re buying, but probably not, and if not, at least you’ll be provided with several cheaper alternatives to Mr. Hooper’s Hemorrhoid cream.

6 Responses to “#18 Providing More Than The Minimum Coverage”

  1. jana Says:

    I do that. A new boss got a wrist bracelet-type tattoo, and I proceeded to tell her that Winston Churchill’s mother had a bracelet tattoo and that it was of a snake. I had just met this new boss and she was surprised. The words just burst out of my mouth. It was like I HAD TO TELL HER.

    After she seemed mildly impressed, I wanted to add that Mrs. Churchill had been at a party at Blenheim Palace, went into labor, and delivered Winston at Blenheim. But someone interrupted and the opportunity was gone. Luckily. This is an affliction. Do you even read these?

  2. SAPL Says:

    Jana,

    Are you talking about me, the Stuff Asperger People Like author? Of course I read comments!

  3. jana Says:

    Oh. OK, good! These are soooo funny.

  4. Jessi Says:

    My husband frequently stops sand says, “That was a yes or no question.”

  5. Violet Black Says:

    This was an acquired trait in my case. I used to give NT-like minimalist responses, but they tended to be so thoroughly misinterpreted that I now prefer to either go into exhaustive detail about what I mean or refrain from answering at all. It would probably help if I had the social skills (and confidence/spoon count) to correct misunderstandings on an as-needed basis, but even on the Internet those elude me. It can be so painful to read the trainwrecks that result from even my most well-thought-out statements that I rarely even read replies to my own comments anymore. I now make it my duty to express every conceivable aspect of my knowledge and opinion in a single post so I will not feel obligated to come back for damage control later.

  6. Regulus Says:

    I learnt the weird way one is not supposed to talk about orgasms or scatological themes unless one is asked about, specially with your mother’s couples church group.

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